How Not to Hit on Girls at Clubs

Saturday night, my husband Jorge went to a bachelor party while I went out to the Cancun Hotel Zone with some of my girl friends. Our first stop was Surfin Burrito for some drinks, which was great because I’ve never been to Surfin Burrito at night!

A few hours later, we walked up to Party Center to see what all the tourists were up to. Nadia was dying to dance, so we went into Congo nightclub.

Inside Congo, Nadia and I were dancing our hearts out on some stairs in the middle of the club. Some random guys asked to take a picture with us… which was weird, but we were in a good mood so we smiled and posed. A few minutes later, one of the photo guys was trying to dance with Nadia while the other one began asking where I’m from. No big deal, but it was a little crowded anyway so we moved to a platform at the edge of the club where lots of girls were dancing solo.

“Perfect,” I thought. “We’ll be able to dance because nobody can hit on us up here.”

So. Wrong.

Not 10 minutes later, an 18-year-old guy hopped up on the platform and began awkwardly dancing near us. Eventually, he asked me if I spoke Spanish, and I told him I did. Then he inched closer to Nadia and after 3 minutes or so of awkward kind-of-dancing, the kid asked Nadia if she minded that he was dancing there. After another 5 minutes of shyness and no success, he excused himself to go to the restroom and never came back.

Nadia and I got to dance for awhile once again, until two guys hopped up on the platform and began awkward “I’m dancing far enough away from you that I might be dancing by myself, but close enough that I might be dancing with you” behavior for several minutes. (This is the worst because I can’t tell them I’m not interested because they’re *technically* not dancing with me, but at the same time they’re taking up my space on an already small platform.) I had my back to them, and one placed his hand on my shoulder. Already annoyed by their hovering, I immediately shrugged him off and kept dancing.

The other one continued to try to dance with Nadia, but she was definitely not interested. To save face, the 2 guys stayed on the platform for a few more minutes dancing on their own, and that’s when we decided to leave.

Can’t 2 gals in committed relationships go to a club without spending 50% of their time wondering how to get rid of creepers?

I dunno. I totally get that lots of single people try to make a “love connection” or whatever at clubs, and if you have the guts to try to make contact with someone, that’s GREAT! I don’t mind at all. I’ll even be nice to you. But why beat around the bush? Just swoop in and make your move already! That way I can turn you down politely and quickly, and we can both move on without 10 minutes of awkward “Are you trying to dance with me or are you just uncomfortably close?” action.


Ok readers… Have you ever experienced any awkward advances? Tell me about it!


10 thoughts on “How Not to Hit on Girls at Clubs

  1. Guys should just be more direct. “Can I dance with you?” is a good question to ask to find out if a girl wants to dance with you. Duh.

    Once I was at the laundromat and some guy kept awkwardly staring at me. Then, before he left, he walked up to me, handed me his number, and literally ran away without saying anything. We later prank called him with Hulk Hogan’s voice.

  2. Hi Laura,

    Great blog. I am a new follower. I am going through all your entries and enjoying them immensely but today I decided to comment because I remember a funny pick up story at the Caribbean Festival here in Toronto. This persistent guy kept pestering me and trying to dance behind me while I was watching a float. I had had enough and told him to leave me alone, I am just here to watch the parade. This guy had the bruised ego syndrome. He became filled with attitude and went from pestering and saying how “nice” I was to saying, “you’re ugly anyway!” That is “if I can’t score I will be nasty ” action.

    The nerve of this creep. I just innocently wanted to watch the parade. Sheesh!

  3. I hate when guys do that! What I think is even weirder is when I’m pushing a baby stroller with a wedding ring on and still get hit on. Flattering, but weird.

  4. Hi
    Thanks for all the advice although at 62 years of age I don’t really hit on anything anymore. I’m only commenting because my daughter just moved from Green Bay Wisconsin to Cancun to start a new challenge of teaching at comunidad educativa del sol and start fresh in a new city and climate. She just started a blog at
    Seems like she is doing some of the same things you have already done. Any advice for a young woman just moving to Cancun? I told her to checkout your blog.

  5. Hello.

    Kristen, if ring and baby doesn’t say taken, nothing will! Lol.

    Curtis, I will check out your daughter’s blog. I too was once in her shoes. Young girl moves to CANCUN for adventures. She will have a great time.

  6. LOL, this is so funny. Guys can be super creepers for sure; I haven’t been to a nightclub in years, but some things never change, I guess. I was telling Steve that I want to go to Vegas and hit up a nightclub, but maybe I don’t.
    When (and if) we ever get our trip to Cancun planned… I totally wanted to go hit up some clubs- like I did when I was in my teens down there… I have a feeling I won’t like it as much anymore. I LOVE to dance, but I hate all that comes with it, I want to dance in my own little bubble that no one can pop!

  7. This made me laugh so much especially “I can’t tell them I’m not interested because they’re *technically* not dancing with me” LOL!

  8. That is so funny! I know how that awkward, not close, but could still be dancing with them thing. I really miss Cancun, I got back yesterday and was there a week. (Next to Flamingo Mall in the white condos.) I enjoyed Senior Frogs and the Pirate Ship. I was too intimidated to go to the actual clubs, because I am just 18.

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